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I'm in a perpetual phase of transition which doesn't seem to be phasing out.

Saturday, May 21, 2011

Family. Amazing.

I drove to Lynchburg, Virginia on Friday
For my grandfather's second funeral.
Which half of him?
I'm not sure.
I just know I slept next to one half of him last night.
His ashes that is.
The urn traveled to Lynchburg from Georgia on my grandmother's lap
In a target shopping bag.

I slept on the sofa in my Uncle's man den.
The bag was placed by that couch on a coffee table.
Should've smoked a cigar by it and had a bloody mary
or eaten some banana pancakes.
In the name of George Cross
The man that drove the famous writer Walker Percy to his doctor appointments
as he was dying of cancer
The man that checked my twiggies, aka rubbed my shoulders
the man that sat me on his lap for 22 years,
and not in a pervy way
The man that shot armadillos with a rifle in his gigantic garden
in Southern Louisiana
and had a heart of gold
A graduate of a military school
who served in World War II
and said "Meow" at Southern eatin' joints as waitors served him his favorite meal,
The man who's first and deeply beloved wife fell asleep one night
on her 41st year of life
and never awoke again
The man who married my grandmother,
an early widow.
And called her Miss Daisy
And yelled out her name even with the dementia deeply set in
if she left the room for too long
Because he needed her
Her presence was a comfort for him
And to a granddaughter observing this need,
it was understood to be deep, authentic, true love.
The man who had to move away from cajun culture
Because of Katrina
And didn't last many years after.
Maybe he was just old,
but I also think he had a broken heart
yearning for his home.

He had long ago become like a father to my father
and 100% a grandfather to me.
I miss him.
so much.

(that wasn't really supposed to be a poem, but I was crying the entire I wrote it, so I got a little minimalisitic with the description. My apologies, if the above words seem like a really suckie attempt at poetry...I'm just sad.)

I love family time more than anything in the world I've decided. This picture of my mom truly illustrates the lovely time we've had this weekend celebrating the life of a wonderful human being.
She's showing off a trout head on a fork at a fancy restaurant. My mom has class.  ha. I love her. She's a hoot.
Thanks for the picture Seester!

Thursday, May 12, 2011

For my Ex-Floridian Friends

Caleb, my friend Danielle and I all went to the mall recently. I'm not usually much of a mall person but I really needed some cotton skirts.... I only own one pair of shorts and then a bunch of pants and I can't handle another scortching hot summer in black skinny jeans.  I figure flowy cotton skirts are the way to go.  Found some for $15, but Danielle insisted I go to the thrift store instead to find a better deal (she's the most glorious finder of great gently used, vintagey get-up ever)...which I have yet to do, so alas! it's either skinny jeans or some shorts that come up to my belly botton and are terribly uncomfortable and hideous.  I did buy some teva sandals on this mall venture, even though they're the goofiest things ever. Danielle is from Orlando and she thinks tevas are the worst. Apparently European tourists love to go to Disney World and whatnot with black socks and tevas. Sounds like a German thing maybe.  I can't remember what countries she specified as notorious for this fashion faux pas. Well I took this picture with my fancy new digital camera that my dad got me for my birthday! hooray! I took the black mis-matched socks off shortly after this snapshot for fear of some sort of podiastroke.

Well I made use of my awesome tevas on a walk today with Nicki Feathers (her last name isn't really feathers, I don't even know what it is, but she wears feather earrings alot so I put her last name in my phone as Feathers, sounds like a classy pornstar, yeah-yuh!) I bought the tevas so that I could walk around in the heat with comfy breathable shows and not stink up tennis shoes all the time with my sweaty feet.  We took her Alaskan Malamute, Ivan, along with us.  He's awesome.  I ran into a couple of different friends on our walk and they both made a joke calling the dog "Ivan the Terrible"  Nicki says the poor dog gets that a lot.  He also gets a lot of compliments because he's beautiful and really well behaved.  A woman even stopped her car and rolled down her window to tell us what a beautiful dog he is.  Nicki says it's a great way to get a date and that normally she's not extroverted but ever since she's gotten this dog, so many people have approached her that she's ended up making conversation with zillions of strangers.  I'm not a dog person, shucks! I bet if I got a pet cat that liked to be on leash then we'd get some attention.

On our walk some random guy handed me a dying rose who we passed by on the sidewalk. It was a nice gester even thoigh the flower made me feel overcome with melancholy for 2 and half seconds or so.  I took this picture and then left the rose on the sidewalk.  Maybe someone more romantic will see it and find some sort of tragic beauty in it and be inspired for a bad poem or something.

Tuesday, May 10, 2011

Dearest Blog,

Sorry for ignoring you. I'll have to come up with some quippy little anecdotes soon.  As for now, I'll leave you with this brief story.  A man wearing cheap, goofy sporty-styled sunglasses with the colored mirror lenses (that create a blinding glare which instantly transports anyone who tries to make eye contact with him back to the 1980s, to a kind of six flags theme park, fanny pack type hell) came into the cafe that I work at.  He persistently hardcore attempted to flirt with my friend/ co-worker Nikki, despite the lack of reciprocation.  She just giggled uncomfortably at everything he said.  He went on  and on about how he'd worked some construction job the night before and hadn't slept at all.  When he was leaving he said "I'll be back" in a terrible Arnold Shwertzenegger (yes I had to google his name to spell, and due to my terrible short-term memory, I still am not quite sure I got it right) voice.  Sounded more like a dracula gorilla...or maybe that's dead on.  Then he went on about how his sunglasses made him look like the Terminator.  When he finally, truly was leaving the bakery he got one last word in with Nikki.  He said "You should just come back to work with me, you can be in charge of working my nail gun." It was mad creepy slash gloriously hilarious.  We got a great laugh immediately after he walked out.

I'll be back...with more soon. Pinky Promise.  (soon being a relative term...relative to what time frame?....I'm not sure...I guess the Looney Zanie sleep lush/ bookworm/ nearly full-time barista/ recent acquirer of a watercolor set/ slightly unstable, functional consumer of alcohol timeline.  I never really understood all that e=mc squared junk, so my little self-centered perception of the way time passes by me like blinks and winks will have to suffice...afterall there wouldn't be science or metaphyics if we weren't all pretty self-absorbed. who cares about the meaning of existenence that isn't totally obsessed with one's self?). I've been working tons and taking on/ focusing on some other hobbies here lately. Please don't hate me.  That would break my wittle heart into a thousand pieces.


Sunday, May 1, 2011


My sis found this picture of me and one of my childhood dogs, Dibbles. she was so fat and ugly and amazing and adorable.  I nearly cried when I saw this picture. I miss her! wow what a nostalgic week its been! First Santa then Dibbles....phew, my tear ducts can't handle all this! (I kind of miss having a lot of hair too, damn me and my compulsive scissor-happy syndrome) When my mom, sister and I brought Dibbles home from the shelter when I was 10 or so, she was skinny and bug-eyed and depressing looking.  My dad took a good look at her and said she looked like something they'd eat in Vietnam.  He fell in love pretty quick though.  Speaking of which, he is still BFF's with my ex-pet cat Percy.  He told me yesterday on the phone that he bought a book on how to teach cats to do tricks.  Good luck with that one, Paps!

We also had a really handsome dog named Tanner growing up.  He was beautiful golden shepardor as we liked to call him...some mix of german shepard, lab and retriever. lovely, awesome, sweet pup.  And I'm reallllly not a dog person.  I remember I used to tell people in middle school ...or somewhere around there...that if Tanner were human he'd be a hot Abercrombie model. ha. wow! how we change over time (or do we? ha..sometimes i sit around psycho-losphizing about that....sounds like something a dinosaur would do. except they're extinct...and that change was pretty straight-forward...a comet maybe? wait we don't know exactly...but regardless something changed and they're all dead except for Nessie and maybe bigfoot....were some dinosaurs mammalian?.) I guess I had a registered trademark imagination back in the day.  oh product placement.  Try playing a drinking game to one of your favorite t.v. shows...drink every time there's product placement, either verbal or'll be shloshed after the half hour is up (21 minutes, really...the commericals themselves don't count...sorry...or ya know play however you like....its a free country damn it! I'm no rule maker.kind of the opposite really...but if I say "I'm a rule breaker" then I just sound silly, because most people reading this know I'm not as rebellious and nuts and radical as maybe I'd like people to think I am...though i'd love you if you thought I was bad ass, because that'd be real sweet of you!)...I guarantee it. unless maybe it's HBO or something of that fancy nature.